Welcome to the Dumb Blonde jokes section of Joke Abyss!
| What do you see when you look into a blondes eyes? |
Category: Dumb Blonde
What do you see when you look into a blondes eyes?
The back of her head.
|
| An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing... |
Category: Dumb Blonde
An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on
scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.
They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If
I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump
off this building."
The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, Burritos again! If I get
burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too."
The blond opened his lunch and said, Bologna again! If I get a bologna
sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too."
The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and
cabbage, and jumped to his death. The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a
burrito, and jumped, too. The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna
and jumped to his death as well.
At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, "If I'd known
how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have
given it to him again!" The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could
have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so
much."
Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said,
"Don't look at me. He makes his own lunch."
|
| Mary Jane was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark... |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 4 0
Mary Jane was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark swimming around
a man. The man was screaming, "Help me! Help me!"
Mary Jane laughed and laughed! She knew that the shark was never going to
help that man!
|
| How do you drownd a blonde? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 4 1
How do you drownd a blonde???
You place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.
Sent by L&S
|
| What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 4 1
What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in Spring
training.
|
| What's the difference between a blonde and a light bulb? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 1
What's the difference between a blonde and a light bulb?
Well, the light bulb is smarter, but the blonde is easier to turn on.
|
| A blonde bought two horses, and could never remember... |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 1
A blonde bought two horses, and could never remember which was which. A
neighbor suggested that she cut the tail of one horse and that worked
great until the other horse got his tail caught in a bush. It tore just
right and looked exactly like the other horse's tail and our friend was
stuck again.
The neighbor suggested she notch the ear off one horse. That worked fine
until the other horse caught his ear on a barbed wire fence. Once again
our friend couldn't tell them apart. The neighbor suggested she measure
the horses for height. When she did, she was very pleased to find that
the white horse was 2 inches taller than the black.
|
| How do you break a blonde's nose? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 1
How do you break a blonde's nose?
Place a dildo under a glass table!
|
| What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 0
What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates?
A mobile sperm bank.
|
| Why do blondes use so much shampoo? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 1
Why do blondes use so much shampoo?
The instructions read: LATHER, RINSE, REPEAT
|
| Three blondes were driving down the highway trying... |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 0
Three blondes were driving down the highway trying
to get to Disneyland. They saw a sign that read 'DisneyLand Left.'
So they went home.
|
| Why does a blonde girl always have a bruise around her belly button? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 1
Why does a blonde girl always have a bruise around her belly button???
Cause blonde boys aren't that smart either.
|
| What do a moped and a blonde have in common? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 0
What do a moped and a blonde have in common?
They're both fun to ride until a friend sees you on one.
|
| Did you hear the one about the blonde fox that got stuck in a trap? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 1
Did you hear the one about the blonde fox that got stuck in a trap?
She chewed off three legs and was still stuck.
|
| Two blondes walk into a building... |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 2 2
Two blondes walk into a building...
You'd think at least one of them would have seen it.
|
| Blonde on blonde |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 3 2
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car
and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The cop asked to see the blonde's driver's license. She dug through her
purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
"What does it look like?" she finally asked.
The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it."
The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it and handed it to
the policewoman. "Here it is," she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying,
"Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."
|
| Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 1 1
Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air?
She missed.
|
| Why did the blonde crash her plane when landing? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 5 4
Why did the blonde crash her plane when landing?
Because the runway was only 25ft long, but a mile wide.
|
| What do you call 2 blondes in the front seat of a car? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 1 1
What do you call 2 blondes in the front seat of a car?
Dual air bags!
|
| What is the difference between butter and a blonde? |
Category: Dumb BlondeRating: 1 1
Q: What is the difference between butter and a blonde?
A: Butter is difficult to spread.
|
Pages:
|
|
